suicide

Its because beauty loses its beauty

Joy loses its joy

There is no desire

There is no future

Inside the mind where the path has always wound 

Around the corner

There is no want for something more

There is no unopen door

The cock has crowed 

The deeds all done

There is nowhere to run

And sleep has been

And to be again

Is a repeat one too many times

The longing has been longed

The promise has been detained

A burning deferred 

The fires all burned

Ashes to ashes

Dust to dust

The brains all rust

The smile 

No lust.

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my solar system…

I’m the person with the most bullshit you’ll ever meet.

I can honestly say that because i know.

I know exactly what i think and say and who i really am behind my smile and quick thinking talk.

I’m afraid to see you.

I wanna be there for you so bad i almost hate myself.

But i’m so afraid.

Afraid that by joining your world somehow i lose the one i can’t be part of right now.

And you.

I want to talk with you.

Have one damn moment where we can really have an honest discussion.

But my words might kill you.

And whatever kills you

Kills me.

Its just that simply

Simple and so twisted that its simply impossible.

I want to repeat her words

Brilliant

And walk away like the sun never sets.

But it does.

And i’m just one more rotation of irritation 

In the lense of your imaginary perfection.

Is that what makes the world go round?

I need you and you need me

My troubles for you 

Your troubles for me?

One little blessing for you

Is a death for me

Is it pain and sorrow

Anguish the tree

That keeps money and relief flowing from you

To me?

 

 

i cant breathe….

Im living like a dream now

Like one where you cant wake up

And all the roads are wrong

And the faces

I know the faces

But the storys jumbled up

I feel outta tune

Kaddywompus

Tripping in the dark

Snarky lines at all the most despairing times

Im tripping down a road that falls up

And climbing down at the same time

And animals and plants rear and bend 

Wrong

I cant stop the voices 

That sway back and forth in my head

The little claw marks raking my skin

Left every morning

Mystery

Ous

Licks produce no flavor

Im locked up in a field

That runs on forever 

Wrapped like a ribbon in a 

Pretty girls hair

But i can never see her face

She keeps on turning

Her face away….

Im lost

And found

And dreaming a life

With eyes pinned open.