I’ve been walking to and from work almost everyday which i’m sure has been great for my overall mental and physical health. I’ve also been trying to drink more water – which so far hasn’t been great.
Why? Because frankly it tastes like acorn jelly. And if you haven’t had acorn jelly then you should – just so you know how much suffering i go through trying to drink water.
So. Yes. I pretty much hate water. Except for those times when I really work out -like in a gym – or am doing out-doors work. Then magically water tastes like the best thing God thought up.
I wonder what in my life I have been avoiding because for me it is “water”.
Accepting those things and doing them despite the distaste is also a kind of walking for me. Walking that isn’t always welcome – but perhaps is needed for my healthy spiritual life.
I’ve been trying to step out of my spiritual comfort zone – as in: Listen more, hope more, pray more, keep my devotional life a daily habit. But so far the only benefit i feel is momentary in-the-moment joy/satisfaction.
The other night I pondered for a few seconds why I’m doing this. But then shoved the thoughts aside as I know its the sliver of action between me and total immaturity. It’s the habits I started upon arriving in Korea so that I could grow. I told myself before leaving America that if I wasn’t leaving this is how my life would have to look in order for me to grow this year.
But there’s more. There’s so much more to this. I have to believe it because I’ve looked back before with regret when i haven’t stepped forward in belief.
Even though i see nothing now, I am believing that when I look back a year from now I will have grown. Maybe in ways that I can’t and won’t see until then. Maybe in ways that I never will have a chance at again unless I do what I’m doing now.
A year from now when I look back maybe there will be more faith by then.
Maybe there will be more hope by then.
Maybe there will be more love by then. And all because I didn’t give up. Maybe each action is a sort of sowing. Maybe it’s a sort of watering and nurturing. Maybe what I’m not giving up on is not the devotions and the early morning routines – but me. Maybe what I’m not giving up on is me. The me God made me to be.
I can only test and see.
What are you doing that seems useless?
What are you hoping for? praying for?
Can you trust that God will sustain and guide you?
Can you commit your way to Him and keep going?
I know you can, if you will.
Give it a year. Then look back and see what grew.
God is faithful. I’ve seen that too.