Little jellyfish of feeling
Are your tentacles carrying poison
My heart is ready to fly
Through the oceans in your eye
We we we are ready for anything
Slipping over the ocean floor
Raising up your thorny tail
Im the wind in the sail
My feet running from your cadence
Im singing joy joy joy
But the colors are all wrong
Theyre starting to smear in the rain
Of your words
So im trying to dance
Past what you think
And into the space of sand ive been left with
Two feet of open space where all i need to know
And your grace
Let your mercy fall on my face
Roll like oil over my lips
My eyes are closed as i hope in you
In the darkness
In the darkness
In the darkness of this pit
Do you want to know?
Know how deep my depravity goes?
Ok, here’s the second part to that question.
#2 question if you want to know just why and how deeply i should dislike myself.
Do you ever wish that someone could die so you could be happy?
No, no, no. I don’t mean like that. Yes, i know. At some point every single one of us has dreamed someone could die and then we believe everything in our life would be ok. Because comeon. Honestly some people are too bad to live. They’ve hurt you or i and they will hurt again. The world would be a better place without them.
But no. That’s not what i’m talking about.
I’m talking about when you meet this guy who’s incredible. And you covet him. And you think perhaps in the future maybe his wife, who is beautiful and nice and who this man adores and you even like her, this lady could die and you could have that guy all for yourself. And that thought kinda pleases you.
And you realize even if you never ever broke a single law of God that that thought right there disqualifies you from ever throwing a stone.
You know what i’m referring to?
That story in John chapter 8 where the people all gathered around a woman who the religious leaders had caught cheating on her husband – and they asked Jesus as a teacher, what they should do.
Verse 7 reveals what happened:They continued to question him, so he stood up and replied, “Whoever hasn’t sinned should throw the first stone.”
Then John writes that they all started leaving till only Jesus was left.
There musta been so much anger and fear in those mens hearts. If even one of them had a thought of doing something they knew they couldn’t. Because for sure another man in the crowd knew something about every other man that would disqualify him from throwing a stone. And if he did anything or said anything he would be known as a liar. Thus breaking another law.
I am totally and utterly disqualified from stone throwing.
This both angers me and humbles me.
Angers me because sometimes i know i’ve been legitimately wronged. And i’ve gotta lay down my rock and leave that person with Jesus, and i know he’s gonna forgive them.
Humbles me because i know when its my turn to stand before Jesus he will forgive me too.